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A Temporary Goodbye

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Hello my friends,

I have just popped in to let you know I am all right, but I will be gone for some time.

My summer holiday has started, and as always I started it with big plans to do a lot. Work on projects, log my camera around everywhere, catch up on my blog reading, make new beautiful posts to share with you.

And then the after-work relaxation kicked in and I slacked and rested and each day I kept thinking, later, in a few hours, I will start a new blog post…..

And I would have…..

 

And then a plane fell from the sky.

 

And my country and I were shocked to the core.

193 Dutch people where killed in one big meaningless swoop and with them about 50 people from other countries too.

Babies and their mothers, whole families on their way to a vacation. Young men and old men, scientists and flower shop owners. Young lovers on a romantic trip and people who had saved up for years to go and visit their family far away. All gone. Just like that.

My country is in shock and in mourning. Two degrees of separation is all it takes. You either know one of the victims personally (I don’t) or you know someone who knows one (I do). All of those people with families, friends, colleagues, schoolmates, and neighbors. There are homes in streets here where no one will return, empty houses, shells, that used to be a safe place for a family.

And the tragedy continues, because we don’t even know if the victims will ever come home to be put to rest here. There are big men with even bigger guns standing in the way. Trying to show the world how tough they are. If only women were in charge……

Anyway. My heart is heavy and my mind is tired. And I don’t feel like wasting my time behind this laptop this summer. I want to be with my friends and family. I want to make the time to go give some of my dear friends a big hug and an apology for too many canceled dates and too many times when I was too busy to spend time with them. I want to do everything I can to cherish every bit of this summer, of my life, because it can be over in a flash, literally.

I am sure I will be working on projects, because it is what I love to do. I am sure I will be taking pictures along the way. But I want to do it all without pressure and most of all without guilt. No more constant worrying about what my next blog post will be, no more checking of visitors stats, but just living here and now.

I will be back. This is a temporary goodbye. This blog is my happy place. My place of beauty and friendship. It brings me joy and it gives me comfort. This little blog of mine is where I remind myself of how the beauty of life can be reflected in one perfect flower, and that taking care of my home is a way of taking care of myself, of my soul.

So come September I will be here. Maybe sooner, we’ll see.

I wish you all the best summer possible (or a wonderful winter for my down under friends). Make it one to remember and please go and give the people you love a hug, from me.

 

 

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Love,

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Comments

  1. Please know that thoughts and prayers continue, leaning on God to comfort you and all others of your country and the families of these wonderful souls taken from the world way too early. There is no time clock when it comes to fulfilling our needs, be they happy or heartbreaking. You will be missed. But better to know you’re taking much needed time to relish most important priorities in one’s life.

  2. CJ ALLEN says:

    So sorry to hear of your loss; I never knew in what part of the world you live. We in the US remember the feeling of senseless loss of many, from a few years ago. I hope things start happening that will bring some peace and closure to the friends and families of those taken so suddenly. I hope those with the power begin to do the right thing.

  3. Oh Marianne you have been on my mind and in my heart for days. I was waiting to see if you would write rather than me jumping into your space after learning this horrible news. I have cried so much. We are all one, in love.

    You have my heart here in New York. I carry you and your country close to me, in prayer.

    I pray for relief and love to reign. Have a beautiful summer.

    I love you, friend.

    xo
    ~Kolein

  4. Very very beautifully written. I don’t usually comment on your blog, but wanted to let you know. Take care, Lynn (UK)

  5. Loving thoughts and prayers for peace and comfort for you and your countrymen. The horror goes on and on. Enjoy the time with those you love, dear Marianne.

    xo Lorrie

  6. Terrye Holcomb says:

    Marianne,
    We all grieve with you, your country and the countless families and friend of those who lost their lives.
    Enjoy your family this summer, I’ll be thinking of you.

  7. My Sweet Friend Marianne,

    I am so sorry for you, your friends and your country. It is a huge tragedy, as you said when big ‘men’ with big guns can do what they want and innocent people die. I will miss you but I too have had a lot more ‘real life’ going on here. May this time off be a healing time for you and your country. Your whole country is in my prayers. With God’s blessings, your friend Emilou

  8. I am so very sorry for your loss as well as your country. These acts of terrorism/violence are so senseless…I cannot wrap my head around the fact that someone could even think of doing this, much less carry it out. I’m retired from American Airlines and I fully understand the anguish that you and your fellow citizens must feel. 9/11 was horrendous and this is too.

    I fully agree that spending time doing what you love with those you love is vitally important! I’ve been having technical and computer issues so haven’t been on line much at all. We lost my almost 16 yr old granddaughter 6/21/13 and it has been devastating as well as being a reminder that we only have this precious moment…nothing more is guaranteed.

    My heart goes out to you ~ and many prayers for you, your family & friends and your country.
    xo
    Pat

  9. Marilyn says:

    Dear Marianne, It was with great relief that I read your post. You told us that your vacation time was coming up, and I hoped that you or your loved ones were not on that plane. I think that the whole world was shocked and saddened by that terrible tragedy. I’m sorry it struck so close to your home. But I agree, we never know when we will draw our last breath. I agree that we need to savor and enjoy each day–each moment. And we need to be prepared to meet the God who loves and created us, and who sent His Son to live and die for us. I have been praying for the families and friends of the passengers and crew, for comfort and healing. And I am praying for peace. We will look forward to your return, when you’re ready. God bless you, Marianne.

  10. Dear Marianne, I think Marilyn before me said it better than I can. I’m also shocked and saddened at what happened. I know it’s no consolation for the families, but I pray their loved ones will be sent home very soon and that
    they may find peace. It could have happened to any one of us or our loved ones, and yes you’re right, we ought to spend our time with those we love and let them know it every day.
    Take care Marianne and let’s not say goodbye, but see you again friend.
    Siggie

  11. I love your summer routine. I adore that you have the nerve to pull the plug when you know you need it most. You work so hard and there just has to be some give for play. Good for you!

    I’m just so sorry it’s under these circumstances. So senseless. Thanks for sharing how it motivated you to take the steps you need to take for yourself and your own family.

    Have a lovely summer, and see you whenever you decide to come back!

  12. In Australia we are also sad and affected by this tragedy. I will miss seeing your emails in my inbox but do understand. Have a wonderful summer Marianne.

  13. Patty Soriano says:

    Songbird, as many others have written, we are sick about this horribly senseless act of violence. We Americans grieve with you, your country, and the families of all those who died needlessly. It hit me as I was reading your words, that I could very well be related to some of the victims. A few years ago I met my birth family and learned that my last name upon birth was VanErkel. My relatives are from your area and it made me even sadder to realize that the people affected by this may be part of my extended family. My deepest sympathies to you all.

  14. I still don’t have words. I came here right after you wrote this post and shared the impact it has had on you and your community– your country. I applaud you for courage and bravery. I applaud you for willingness to unplug and take back time with friends and family.
    I hope that as you move through the grief and tragedy– you find solace and healing in your heart. Peace.
    …the grace of the Lord Jesus Christ be with your spirit. Amen. –
    Pat

  15. Hi Marianne,

    I can’t help checking your page to see if you’re back – I miss you and your posts. It’s a good thing to know when you need to make a stop and rewind. Wishing you well and – enjoy your family time.

  16. I hope you’ve found a way to spread the light throughout this summer. I bet you have.

    Sometimes these tragedies shape us into more beautiful beings we never knew we needed to be.

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